Sunday, March 1, 2009

Our latest houseguests...

So we absolutely love our beach house, and adore living here. HOWEVER, there have been a few minor, okay, to me they have been major "bumps" in our stay so far. Everyday for the past few weeks we had seen a raccoon, walking along our deck, jumping from our roof, and around the yard. It worried me because I've always thought they were vicious, and attack quite easily... since Carson and I are ALWAYS outside... I was a little stressed about it. Anyway, we were laying in bed one night and all of a sudden I hear LOTS of noise up in our attic. I wake Rod up and tell him to listen....I'm super freaked out and start to panic. "Can it get in, is it going to eat Carson, it's going to get us!" I'm a little paranoid to say the least. The thing was running around and scratching so loud, that I slept in our spare room. So next morning I'm on the phone with my landlord... she tells me she'll call an animal control company and have them out ASAP. So they show up later that day and just guess what they're called? "CRITTER GITTERS".... no joke! It is so hillbilly out here sometimes! Not to mention, the guys truck is painted like an alligator! HA HA... He sets 3 traps and says he'll be by in the morning to pick up the raccoon.... well the damn thing outsmarted the traps every day! It managed to get the food out, and set off the trap without getting caught! This lasted for 6 days.... and for 6 nights I heard it running around in our attic, above our master bedroom... so guess where Lindsay slept? HA HA... So finally our lovely critter gets trapped.... YEAH!! I'm so stoked. The guy comes the next morning, seals off all the entrance points to the attic where it would've gotten in and he leaves. I'm so happy. I get into bed that night just beaming that I can have a good night sleep!!! Well, that ended all too quickly when at 3 am I start hearing this awful crying and scratching... Of course I wake up Rod and his response is, "What do you want me to do about it?" ... so back to the spare room I go..... So our little house guest made a nest up there and had some babies!! AH!! I call the animal guy in the morning and he comes back. This time he brings his,"little lady" as he refers to her, and he is ready to go up in the attic and get them. Of course the attic above our room can only be accessed through my side of the closet... so I have to take all my clothes out so the guy won't get them dirty. He goes up and looks for them, of course the babies are in a spot in the attic that he can't reach.... ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME!!??!! So he tells me that he will have to cut a hole in our ceiling in order to get them out! Yep, a hole. So he gets his ladder, cuts a sweet hole in our ceiling and starts reaching his paws up there to find them.... (keep in mind this guy has NO GLOVES ON!!---- must be a hick thing....) He pulls the first baby out... it's so tiny and he hands it to his "little lady"... she puts it in her sweatshirt pocket! I'm dying. Where's the kennel, or box, or something? Your POCKET? Wow.... the next one he pulls out poops down his arm and as he hands it to her, it poops all over her sweatshirt! At this point I'm ready to have a heart attack.... for those of you who know me well, I'm quite obsessed with germs and being clean... raccoon poop=nasty=a very disturbed Lindsay! Anyway, she tells me that she has to wash it off and goes into my bathroom, where I brush my teeth and wash my face! She puts the raccoons in my SINK to get herself cleaned off!! I thought at this point I might pass out. I kept asking her, " Do you want soap? Disinfectant? BLEACH? The things are in my sink and she's just wiping the poop off with a tissue! YUCK!!! Doesn't even wash her hands! Anyways... I'll make my very long story, short. He gets two more "coons" out, I give them a towel and box to put them in, and our "critter" problem is finally solved! Come to find out these people actually raise raccoons and have a few for pets.... that really does explain so much! (grin).... Needless to say my nights are very quite now, and that's just how I like it!


*** side note--- I've disinfected my bathroom and bedroom several times now... It still somehow feels kinda dirty!***

*****Oh and Mckel, Andrea? Why didn't this happen to you guys? And Katie, ha ha... at least you won't have to worry about it this summer!! =-)

11 comments:

Mckel said...

That is hilarious! Although, I don't think it would be funny if it would have happened to me! I find it creepy that things can get up in the attic...wonder what else is living up there?! When we lived there we had problems with raccoons getting in the garbage at night. Mark would sneak out with a flashlight and hit them with it or trap them in the garbage. He found it so entertaining...I found it creepy. He especially liked when they would hiss at him. Have you seen any snakes? I sure love Florida and the beach house, but I am not a fan of the wildlife there!

Tabitha said...

You are so funny Lindsay! Who fixed the ceiling?

the walker's said...

Oh yeah, I forgot about the hole!! Some lady came like a week later to fix it, ha ha... I hated having it! I kept thinking something else was going to come out!

Katie said...

Ummm...wondering if we should sign the lease?! I laughed so freaking hard at the story. The coon poop was very disturbing. It made me sick to think that there are people like that out in the public eating at the same resturaunts that I do (wash your hands people!)...hopfully they're not frequents at Flavors. Sure do miss that place. Anywho, a while back Andrea told me that they heard something in the attic when they lived there. AND it kept her up all night....i never heard the rest of the story from her but apparently it didn't go away.

Nicolette said...

I'm sorry, but this story is freaking hilarious! Zac and I were dying laughing (but at the same time thinking "Halleluja it's not us!"). Critter Gitters! Give me a break! That really is so hillbilly. I would probably die after seeing racoon poop dribbling down that lady's arm and close to my bed/carpet!!! You need to make this into a short story:)

Steph said...

That is so funny! Now I know why Danny and I didn't stay there for our last semester. I probably would have done the same thing.

Cindy said...

Oh my gosh Linds! I was laughing SOO hard at this! Scott and Kaden were laughing at me and made me read it to them. You are too funny! We are so much alike it kills me! I am not okay with germs and would have done/thought the exact same thing! I'm sorry it happened to you but I am so happy it's over. You should be a writer! haha

Andrea Barney said...

OK so here is the thing- I should have told you before this but we did have the racoon in the attic when we lived there. Except you were smart enough to think it was a racoon. I was convinced it was a person and Jason was convinced it was a racoon. I called the police in the middle of the night to find out what protocol is for "big things" in our attic. Someone actually came out and fixed the spot where they wer getting in but lucky for you they found a way in just in time to have babies. I honestly feel for you.

Todd, Christy, and Co. said...

That would freak me out! Especially having a Hole in the ceiling! No way! Those babies look so cute and sweet- but the momma definately looks like she'd get vicious if she had to! I'm glad you survived! Can't wait to see you in a couple weeks!

Nicole said...

Jared and I were cracking up!! You are hilarious! Jared had a patient recently that had 30 "coons" for pets... they lived inside his house with him! Jared thinks they were pretty vicious, the guy had scratches all over him and some crazy infection... but he claimed his "coons" were clean. Some people!

Heather Coon said...

Those little things are creepy...Hey I sent you an invite to my blog, and those pics of Carson on the long board are so cute! Aaron would love it if our boy takes after him riding his longboard. What the heck Holly can ride it, right! Miss ya!